Author: Karol

  • What I’ve Been Enjoying In Isolation

    Note: This was published on May 19, 2020 and a lot has changed since then.

    I think I need to preface this with saying that since I am fairly antisocial these last few months have not been all that different than normal life.

    On normal weekdays my wife and I wake up and get ready for the day. Breakfast and whatnot. That hasn’t changed. What has changed is she doesn’t leave in the morning to go to the office anymore.

    On normal weekends my wife and I sleep in, make breakfast burritos, and go outside for a run/hike/bike/walk. This hasn’t changed except that we don’t go to busy parks or trails.

    What has changed is maybe somewhat obvious:

    • We’ve cancelled travel plans such as a 2 week trip to Yosemite in August. We still have the Yosemite campsites booked (which, if you’ve tried to book before, you know that feels like winning the lottery), but there’s little chance we’ll book flights. I’m hoping they cancel for us so we don’t have to pay a cancellation fee, which is what happened with our Memorial Day camping plans.
    • We haven’t entered a store or other place of business since early March.
    • I carry two N95 masks with me wherever we go. Since we stay away from people and since we don’t go indoors anywhere we haven’t needed to use them, but in case of emergency and all that.
    • I’ve been spending too much time on twitter.
    • Anxiety 📈

    Anyway, this is what I’ve been enjoying in isolation.

    Music

    Fetch the Bolt Cutters – Fiona Apple

    I’ve loved Fiona Apple’s music since her first album Tidal so I am extraordinarily biased, but Fetch the Bolt Cutters is phenomenal. Switched On Pop did an episode about it called Did Fiona Apple Just Release a Perfect Album? which I enjoyed.

    Come Over When You’re Sober, Pt. 1 and Come Over When You’re Sober, Pt. 2 – Lil Peep

    I discovered his music two years after he died so I’m late to it, but I quite like it. It’s a poppy electronic blend of rock and rap. And when I put it like that it sounds just terrible. It’s not. I find myself humming the hooks often.

    On The Widow’s Walk – The White Buffalo

    One of my favorite artists released another great album this year. Jake Smith (aka The White Buffalo) also has a funny YouTube series called In The Garage.

    Reunions – Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit

    Isbell’s solo album Southeastern is one of the best albums of the past decade and he consistently writes good music.

    THE GOAT – Polo G

    Polo G’s debut album Die A Legend was one of my favorite albums released last year. This is a great followup.

    The High Place Phenomenon

    I’ve written some demos of my own instrumental shoe-gazey-ish music inspired by current events:

    “Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that ‘my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.’”

    Isaac Asimov

    Song: Asimov Was Right

    Last year I released a demo EP inspired by National Parks we visited on a road trip.

    Books

    I read some of these pre-pandemic.

    And Then We Grew Up: On Creativity, Potential, and the Imperfect Art of Adulthood by Rachel Friedman

    I gave this 5 stars on GoodReads. My wife loved it, too. (She also loved Rachel’s other book The Good Girl’s Guide To Getting Lost but I haven’t read that one.)

    The Nickel Boys by Colson Whitehead

    I read this and Colson’s other Pulitzer winner The Underground Railroad back-to-back in a handful of days. He is one of the best writers of our time.

    Filth by Irvine Welsh

    I was told this was really messed up. It is. Not for the faint of heart. The phonetic Scottish slang also makes it a difficult read, but eventually — with the help of Google — you begin to understand it.

    The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion

    I saw this on Bill Gates’ reading list and it was a fun read. I didn’t like the sequel as much, and I haven’t read (and probably won’t read) the third in the series.

    The Likely Resolutions of Oliver Clock by Jane Riley

    This was one of the free Amazon First Reads and it was a fun read with a slightly morbid premise.

    TV

    This is mostly skewed to Netflix, because we just got a subscription in March, but I added a couple other things we enjoyed prior to isolation from other services.

    Love – Netflix

    Starring Gillian Jacobs from Community. The first season was really good and the third/final season bored me, but overall it was a good show. My wife liked it more than me, I think.

    After Death – Netflix

    Ricky Gervais is never not good. We just started watching this and like it a lot. It’s both melancholic and funny.

    #blackAF – Netflix

    I’ve actually watched this twice. It’s the funniest show since Letterkenny, which was the funniest show since It’s Always Sunny. Kenya Barris and Rashida Jones play their roles here perfectly and hilariously.

    Crashing – Netflix

    If you liked Fleabag (Amazon Prime) — you know, if you’re a well adjusted human and all — then you’ll love Crashing. Phoebe Waller-Bridge is so damn talented.

    Kim’s Convenience – Netflix

    This is one of those things that’s so bad, it’s good. We’ve watched ~10 episodes and it’s good for a few laughs. I mostly only like the scenes with Mr. and Mrs. Kim, and Mr. Kim in particular makes me laugh out loud often. The other characters annoy me because they behave like tweens when they’re supposed to be adults in their 20s.

    Escape at Dannemora – Amazon Prime

    Watched this last year. Patricia Arquette is phenomenal in everything, which brings me to …

    The Act – Hulu

    Patricia Arquette is phenomenal in everything, redux. Also watched this last year.

    Movies

    Blow The Man Down – Amazon Prime

    Dark. Funny. Great sailor songs from David Coffin.

    Circus of Books – Netflix

    A conservative woman and her husband open a famous gay porn book store and production company. It sounds like fiction, but it’s a documentary.

    Frances Ferguson – Amazon Prime (although it looks like it’s no longer free)

    A beautiful young substitute teacher goes to prison for having sex with a student. It sounds like a documentary, but it’s a work of fiction.

    Knock Down The House – Netflix

    I was not expecting to like this documentary about Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and other progressive political hopefuls, but it surprised me.

    Lil Peep: Everybody’s Everything – Netflix

    The barely triumphant, mostly sad, story of Lil Peep.

    Food

    HomeChef

    I think I’ve tried every popular meal kit besides Blue Apron, and they are not all created equal. (Blue Apron looks good but the meals all look too time consuming.)

    HomeChef hits it out of the park with nearly every meal, but I got tired of the cleaning and prep. Their oven-ready meals solved this problem somewhat, but they also aren’t as tasty as their more involved meals. I cancelled HomeChef a couple weeks ago, although I might subscribe again at some point. I used to regularly buy HomeChef at Harris Teeter (Kroger) as well, but since I’ve stopped entering buildings that’s no longer the case.

    Freshly

    Freshly doesn’t hit it out of the park, but their meals are pretty tasty and quick. The meals are shipped already cooked and you just need to reheat in the microwave. Since I’m only doing grocery shopping every two weeks, and there are limits to what you can buy (and stuff is often sold out), having Freshly delivery helps a lot to make sure we have enough food.

    My biggest problem with both HomeChef and Freshly (and every other meal kit) besides the enormous amount of trash they generate is that most of the meals hover around 500 calories or less. For a 6’5″ man that is less than 20% of my required daily caloric intake. It’s just not enough food.

    Soylent / Huel

    My wife likes Huel (chocolate), I prefer Soylent (chocolate). We drink them a few times per week. I like to have it after a run or when I’m hungry but don’t feel like making anything. I don’t think anybody should have these for every meal, but they’re a nice caloric supplement with a good balance of protein, carbs, and fat.

    Walmart Grocery Pickup

    I like that you just pop your trunk, they load your groceries, and you’re on your way. I prefer this to grocery delivery because my anecdotal experience with the handful of times I’ve gotten delivery is the delivery drivers don’t practice pandemic-hygiene. Getting pickup also forces me to drive our car for 30 minutes every couple weeks which I’ve told myself is necessary.

    Apps

    Duolingo – Brazilian Portuguese

    We were planning a trip to Amazonas for next March, but it’s unlikely that we’ll go before 2023 now since their response to the pandemic has been arguably worse than ours. Duolingo has become less fun without a concrete timeline, but it’s still an enjoyable way to get exposure to a language. I’ve been wanting to go to the Amazon River since 3rd grade, but I put it off so I’d always have something to look forward to. Oops!

    Libby

    I mostly stopped buying books once we moved back to the US four years ago since the library has or can get any book I want (via interlibrary loan). The Libby app from Overdrive.com is great. You can borrow audiobooks or Kindle books directly from your local library. The selection isn’t as good as the print books at the library, but it’s still plentiful. I’ve been using Libby for a few years now and it has come in more handy than ever now that I can’t go to the library.

    I think that about covers it. What have you been enjoying in isolation?

  • Can We Talk About Travel “Hacking” and Airline Miles Valuations?

    Originally posted January 29, 2018. Updated July 26, 2018, Nov 5, 2018, and March 21, 2019.

    Let’s not bury the lede: it’s not travel hacking. It’s “signing up for credit cards to get reward point bonuses for free or discounted airfare and hotels.”

    Whew!

    Not as sexy, I know, but it’s reality.

    Now let me be clear: I love it. I wasn’t able to do it for a few years (my wife and I weren’t living in the US until 2016), but as of June of 2017 I went at it hard.

    I Didn’t Travel Hack, But Here Are The Credit Card Bonuses I’ve Earned Since June 2017

    • 75,000 United Miles via Chase MileagePlus card (good for 3-4 roundtrip domestic flights; I no longer have this card as I cancelled after 1 year so as not to pay the annual fee)
    • $150 cash back via Amex Blue Cash Everyday (this one I regret because I wasn’t aware of Chase’s 5/24 rule at the time; more on that soon)
    • 50,000 Chase Ultimate Rewards via the Chase Sapphire Reserve card (good for $750 worth of hotels or airfare; cancelled this card and downgraded to a no annual fee Chase card because the annual fee was only worth it for me for the first year)
    • 120,000 Southwest RapidRewards + Southwest Companion Pass (My wife flies with me for free until 12/31/2019! Including when I pay for a flight with points!) via the Chase Southwest Premier and Chase Southwest Plus cards. (120,000 points is good for $1,920 in airfare. Note: I cancelled the Plus card after 1 year, but kept the Premier.)

    Added after this article was originally posted:

    • 45,000 Wyndham Rewards via the Barclays Wyndham Visa
      • $75 annual fee, but was $25 for first year
      • Good for 3 free nights (but see bullet point below)
      • We used these free nights at The New Yorker and it was a great redemption. I decided to pay the 2nd annual fee of $75, which includes 6,000 points, but I’m not sure if I’ll do it again in 2020. They’re making changes to the rewards program in April and we’ll see if they’re good changes. I suspect hotels like The New Yorker will cost more points than they did for us.
    • 100,000 Hilton Honors points via the American Express Hilton Honors Ascend
      • $95 annual fee
      • 1 weekend night free after first year (no longer available, but they increased the bonus points to 150,000 so it’s a better deal now anyway); I’m mostly alone in this as far as people who gather points is concerned, but this is actually my favorite card right now due to incredible bonus point earning opportunities)
      • Update March 21, 2019: They didn’t give me the 1 weekend night certificate after I paid the 2nd annual fee. (I spoke to them on the phone, via text chat, and via twitter.) Very disappointing, borderline fraudulent, and I reported the situation to the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau.
    • 64,000 Choice Privileges points via the Barclays Choice Privileges Visa
      • No annual fee!
      • 32,000 points after first $1,000 spent in 90 days and another 32,000 points with $3,000 total spent in 180 days.
      • You also get Gold status, which means you get some kind of gift at check-in. We’re big fans of cheaper hotels like Sleep Inn (a Choice Hotels brand) so I’m happy this is a no annual fee card, even if Choice points aren’t considered as valuable as some other chains.

    This puts me over 5/24 — 5 credit cards from any bank in the past 24 months — meaning I can’t get most personal Chase cards for quite some time. (I’ll be eligible again at the end of 2019.)

    So, I guess, this is the only part of travel “hacking” that’s actually a “hack.” Get all the best Chase cards first, before getting any other provider. Unless, of course, the other provider is giving away an exceptional bonus. Bonuses change regularly so sometimes it’s just luck, being at the right place at the right time.

    Onto what this is all really about:

    Why Airline and Hotel Miles Valuations Are Miscalculated

    If you try to maximize the value of your points you’ll find a lot of well known folks talk about how much 1 point is worth. e.g. Southwest RapidRewards are worth 1.6cpp (cents per point) and Ultimate Rewards are worth 2.1cpp and so on.

    Some of these “travel hacking experts” value points based on irregular scenarios.

    Southwest RapidRewards are some of the few points that are directly tied to the cash value of a ticket so they are worth 1.6cpp unless you’re using the Companion Pass because then they’re worth a big 3.2cpp. e.g. A $100 Southwest ticket costs 6,250 Southwest RapidRewards points (1.6cpp). If you add a Companion you only pay the $11.20 in taxes and $200 worth of tickets is still 6,250 RapidRewards points (3.2cpp).

    But others are not so simple.

    Let’s take a look at Ultimate Rewards. The straight value of a UR is 1cpp. Let’s say you want to book a hotel that costs $500. If you use Ultimate Rewards to book the hotel it’ll cost 50,000 UR (through the Ultimate Rewards portal). But! If you have the Chase Sapphire Preferred card you get 1.25cpp and if you have the Chase Sapphire Reserve you get 1.5cpp. (Which is why I got the Reserve. $500 in hotel costs are 33,334 Ultimate Rewards points if you have Reserve.)

    Some people who shall remain nameless claim Ultimate Rewards are worth 2.1cpp because you can transfer them to an airline partner and use them for a high value First or Business class ticket that would cost a lot.

    The issue with this scenario is you would probably never pay for a First or Business class flight so they’re not actually worth that! In reality, since you usually pay for Economy fares you’ve devalued your points by using double or triple the points to pay for a better fare class.

    The popular valuations are based on a sort of straw man. “Well, this First class flight would normally cost me $10k but since I used 120,000 miles I saved $10k and got 12 cents per mile!”

    No, no, no. Not at all.

    Utility vs Dollar Value: A Different Way To Make Airline Miles Valuations

    I suggest you maximize utility and not dollar value.

    If you normally pay for Economy fares then you actually lose money when you book a Business or First trip with airline miles. Instead of spending 60,000 points on the economy flights you spent double which means you got one less flight out of the scenario that you now somehow have to pay for.

    Which of the following scenarios maximizes utility?

    1. One (1) Business or First flight for 120,000 miles
    2. Two (2) Economy flights for 120,000 miles

    The answer is obvious. Two flights have greater utility than one.

    Let me be clear here in saying I don’t have a problem using lots of points for a fare class upgrade. I’ve done it! It’s amazing flying in the upper fares internationally. Really, it’s a whole different experience. And I’ll probably do it again in the future. I’m just not going to fool myself into thinking I saved money in the process.

    My preference at the moment is to maximize utility. I want to get as many flights as possible and I don’t care if I have the privilege of flying in Economy instead of Business or First while doing so.

    As an aside: goodness am I tired of hearing people complain about economy airline seats. I’m 6’5″ and somehow I’ve been alright on hundreds of flights even if sometimes my knees are jammed into the seat in front of me. You’re alright too. You know the worst part about flying economy? It’s not the seats. It’s the whiney adult babies. Anyway …

    Interestingly, maximizing utility can be a money loser as well if you’re traveling more than you’d normally travel.

    How Travel “Hacking” Actually Costs Us Money (and I’m okay with it)

    I specifically earned the Southwest Companion Pass so we could be decadent.

    Upcoming weekend getaways. What are we, trillionaires?!

    We’re flying to New Orleans for a weekend. We’re flying to Las Vegas for a weekend. That is ridiculous. It’s not something I would ever do normally. It’s decadent. Some might even say wasteful.

    But my wife has limited vacation time (hence late Friday flights; she doesn’t miss work) and I want to show her as much of the US as possible. The Southwest Companion Pass plus the 125,000 points I earned (signup bonus + normal spending) helps facilitate this goal. I also have $400 in Southwest gift cards acquired via the Amex Platinum card airline credit so even our flight taxes & fees ($11.20 per roundtrip per person) are paid for.

    But if we didn’t have the Companion Pass we wouldn’t have the following expenses:

    • Roundtrip airport Taxi/Uber/Lyft
    • Hotels (We do use points where we can, obviously. But it’s not always possible.)
    • Food (We eat out less than a handful of times per year so any eating out done on these trip weekends is extra.)
    • Whatever other spending for things we decide to do that we wouldn’t do if we stayed in Raleigh.

    This is willful decadence. It’s true that these trips will cost us less than if we had to pay cash, but under normal circumstances we would not be going on these trips at all, so the net result is they cost us money. To be fair, we’re in a position that these trips aren’t going to put us in the poor house, but they are extra and pretending otherwise is Trumping the truth.

    OK, cool, you’re convinced. Which cards should you get to maximize utility?

    Note: For the cards I have I’m able to get referral links so I’ve used them below for those three relevant cards. I get 10,000 points per referral and your points bonus doesn’t change. Thank you for helping our travels!

    If you fly domestic and Southwest flies out of your home airport this is a no brainer. Even if you don’t plan on flying extra like we do. The current point bonuses on the personal cards are 40,000 each, meaning after hitting spending requirements to get said bonuses you’ll have over 84,000 points. You need to earn 110,000 points to get the Companion Pass so you’ll need to spend a lot more before you get the pass. (Or wait until they’re offering better sign up bonuses of 50,000+ again.) The other option is to get one of the personal cards and the Southwest business card because that has a 60,000 points bonus and you’ll get the Companion Pass without extra spending. Get all 3 and you’ll have over 140,000 RapidRewards!

    Note: You can apply for all three of these cards on the same day. I got approved for the two personal cards after applying within minutes of each other, but I did have to call them so they could verify some things. “Why are you applying for 2 more cards when you already have 2 Chase cards?” My answer: “Your bonuses are crazy good and I like Southwest.” They accepted that!

    Wait at least 30 days before applying for more Chase cards. They’ll only approve two personal cards within 30 days.

    Next, you’re gonna want some hotels. I think the Chase Sapphire Reserve is great, even though it has a $450 annual fee. That fee includes $300 in travel spending credit (airfare, hotels, highway tolls, Uber/Lyft) so it’s effectively a $150 annual fee. There are also some other benefits that may be useful for you. (If you don’t already have it Global Entry is great and you’ll get it free.) You get 50,000 Ultimate Rewards points worth $750 in travel after spending $4,000 within 90 days.

    If I hadn’t gotten the Amex card which put me at 5/24 and ineligible for more Chase cards I would have also gotten the Chase Sapphire Preferred card for 50,000 Ultimate Rewards points after $4,000 spending in 90 days and $0 annual fee for the first year.

    When you’re done with that I’d start looking at the other available cards and accompanying bonuses (Amex Platinum and hotel cards). But the above is gonna take you a while so get on it.

    Need hotels instead? Get the 150,000 Hilton Ascend bonus here.

    The Biggest Drawback of Credit Card Signup Bonuses (for us, anyway)

    The biggest issue we have with these cards is we don’t have a lot of expenses so meeting the spending requirements sometimes takes some planning. Spending $4k in 90 days on a new card is difficult for us because we don’t eat out, don’t drink, and don’t regularly spend money on anything but groceries and necessities.

    I’ve taken to buying Walmart, gas station, and Hotels.com gift cards (all at a discount through Raise, of course) if I need to meet a spending requirement and I’m coming up short because I know I’ll use all of those sooner or later. If your monthly spending is higher than ours then you won’t have this problem. (Although you might want to save money by buying gift cards through Raise anyway. Their 1 year guarantee is legit.)

    Karol's Raise Savings
    I’ve used Raise quite a bit to meet credit card bonus spending requirements.

    I use a few other travel saving tactics — optimal Priceline bidding, easy ~15% savings at Hotels.com (couple it with their 11th night free promo and it’s closer to 25% savings), and others — but since this is already nearly 2,000 words I’ll stop here for now. Another time, okay?

    Oh, wait, before I forget because I know people wonder: this all has only a small impact on credit score. It does dip down temporarily for a month or so after every credit card application, but whether using FICO or Vantage 3.0 scoring I’m still in excellent range. That said, if you’re planning on getting a mortgage or other loan soon you should hold off until after you do that before you start applying for lots of credit cards.

    ###

    Want to keep on top of these opportunities? My favorite places are Doctor of Credit and reddit.com/r/churning.

  • Good, Gooder, Goodest – My Favorites of 2017

    Here are the last two years:

    Gotta keep on theme with the title, ya know?

    In general, 2017 was a pretty good year. That’s a lie. Mentally, it was probably the worst year I’ve ever had and it prompted me to go on medication. But it improved drastically towards the end (and I also went off the meds).

    Back in November I got an e-mail from Amex with my favorite place to visit:

    Anyway, how about we don’t dwell on that and move on to the good, huh?

    Books

    I didn’t read many books this year. Only 20. (Including 2 audio books.) And I also didn’t give anything 5 stars besides The Complete Peanuts Vol 1: 1950-1952. I stand by that rating. Although I’m not sure reading a collection of comic strips counts as reading a book. Personally, I’d disallow it.

    So my favorite book from 2017?

    The Road by Cormac McCarthy

    I had high expectations for The Road because I’ve been hearing about it for years and it is often recommended. Expectations are tough because they can really ruin an artistic experience. I’m happy to say that The Road lived up to the hype. I should probably give it 5 stars, but it’s so sad that I’m not sure I can.

    Runner up:

    Secondhand Souls by Christopher Moore

    My favorite Christopher Moore book is Lamb, and I have yet to read something by him that I hated. He’s an absurdist and I’m a fan of the absurd. Secondhand Souls doesn’t disappoint, although it’s the 2nd in a series so don’t read it first.

    Non-fiction shout outs:

    Petty: The Biography by Warren Zanes was phenomenal. I had just really gotten into Tom Petty’s music over the past year. Then he died. Anyway, this book is great.

    The Simple Path to Wealth by JL Collins. Mostly stuff I already knew, but haven’t followed over the years like I should have. (Had I, I’d never have to work another day in my life. ha!) It’s well written and I highly recommend it if you need to take hold of your spending and/or investing.

    BONUS related to books: The Public Library. The physical building. It’s one of my favorite places to visit and I only really rediscovered libraries in 2016. (Did you know you can rent eBooks on your Kindle via your public library?) We recently moved and I made sure it was within biking/walking distance of the library.

    Music

    This is not up for debate. Album of the Year goes to …

    I See You by The xx

    I See You is such a perfect album I don’t want to sully it with my words.

    K.Flay and The White Buffalo also released excellent albums this year.

    Tech

    Mi Band 2 – I bought this for my wife because she needs a 100% volume alarm to wake up. Which, of course, wakes me up too early. The Mi Band was $25 from AliExpress and wakes her up via vibration. Maybe literally a sanity saver. Beyond that, my wife actually loves it for running / fitness tracking. The battery lasts about 2 weeks between charges. And do I need to repeat the price? $25!

    Amazon Echo – I listed this last year, but it’s still on the list. Love it. We also pay for the $4/month Echo-only Amazon Music Unlimited which is an excellent add-on.

    Ting cell phone service

    We’ve been using Ting for over a year now and our total cell phone bill for 2 lines averages under $30 per month. $26.22, including taxes, actually. That’s total, not per line. To be fair, we’re not data-heavy users. Get $25 to try Ting here (we get $25 as well).

    The BOA lacing system – One of the cool things about working at Sumo is that they go on phenomenal company retreats twice per year. In December we went to the Canadian Rockies (Banff / Lake Louise) for 5 nights of hiking/snowboarding/other fun. I hadn’t gone snowboarding in about a dozen years and wow has technology changed. I learned about the BOA system there and I loved it so much that I just bought inline skates with it. I won’t try to explain BOA but I promise you you’ll love it if you’re a skater/skier/snowboarder. BTW, I know it’s straight out of the 80s but my wife and I love inline skating for fitness/fun. We did it a lot in Poland and slacked on buying skates after moving to the US. I’m happy I slacked now, though, because I wouldn’t have known about BOA otherwise. It solves the one frustration I always had with inline skating and snowboarding: putting the boots on and lacing them up! With BOA it takes seconds instead of minutes.

    Instant Pot pressure cooker – We have the DUO60. Got it for $68.95 on Amazon’s Black Friday last year, but didn’t use it until about 6 months later. I love it. Particularly in the summer when it’s hot and I don’t want to heat up the house/kitchen. I will say this: instant it is not. Let’s say you’re making something (chili or chana masala are my go to) that takes “15 minutes.” Well, it takes 5-10 minutes to build up pressure first and then you have to wait about 30 before you can actually open the pot because you have to wait for the pressure to release. So it’s not any quicker than doing it on the stovetop. But it doesn’t heat the whole kitchen and it’s all self-contained so it’s hands off. I use it once/week, sometimes more.

    Travel

    Grand Canyon National Park (South Rim) – It’s kind of sad that I never visited the Grand Canyon before. WTF was my problem? Anyway, my wife and I went on a 5,000 mile National Parks road trip this year (5 National Parks + St Louis’s Gateway Arch which is owned by the National Park Service) and the Grand Canyon was the highlight. I was worried that the Grand Canyon would be annoying tourist hell, but even though we went smack dab during peak season (June) it wasn’t. Yes, it was packed, but it wasn’t all too difficult to get away from people. We are both itching to go back.

    Arches National Park – It’s beautiful, but unfortunately part of the park was closed for renovation. Bonus: a few miles from Arches is Canyonlands National Park. While Arches was packed Canyonlands barely had any visitors at all. Too bad, because it’s also really beautiful.

    Canyonlands NP, just down the road from Arches NP.

    Tip: if you’re gonna visit a few National Parks it’s probably worth it for you to buy an Annual Pass for $80. You can also get a free pass if you’re officially disabled. The pass is particularly nice at the Grand Canyon: you don’t have to wait in the long line to enter the park because Annual Pass holders have their own lane.

    Other

    Ibanez AW54 Acoustic Guitar – It’s crazy to me that this guitar costs less than $200, including shipping. Twenty-three years ago I bought my first acoustic guitar — a crappy acoustic guitar, I must say — used at a pawn shop for more than I paid for this one (adjusted for inflation). Anyway, I hadn’t had an acoustic for a few years and I missed it, but I’m also not a professional and didn’t need a “dream” guitar like a Martin. I was near choosing an Epiphone, because they have never done me wrong, but after reading lots of reviews went with the Ibanez AW54. I’m glad I did. I did have to adjust the truss rod and file down the bridge because the neck arrived slightly warped (note: this is normal, wood bends!; truss rod adjustment wrench included with the guitar) and the action was too high. These are easy adjustments and actually cheap guitars are great for learning how to fix and maintain guitars because you don’t have to worry so much about causing expensive damage.


    There is probably something(s) I missed, but that’ll do for this year I think. If you have anything to say let me know in the comments.

  • Rediscovering The Joys Of Tent Camping

    Since moving back to the US my wife and I have gone camping more than either of us had camped in the previous spans of our lifetimes. (Well, maybe not quite, but it sounds better like that, doesn’t it? I think I’d gone camping 5 or 6 times prior to July 2016 and have gone 4 times since then.)

    I did not grow up in what I would consider an “outdoorsy” family by any stretch of the imagination, but the first vacation that I can recall was a camping vacation. I think that was probably due to budget more than any kind of love of the outdoors. (We’ll get to that, but it’s actually a great reason to go camping.) By the age of 13 or so my parents bought a small vacation cottage and I stopped going camping altogether until my late 20s.

    As I got older camping wasn’t on my radar as a form of travel or recreation. I didn’t have friends who camped (or even traveled much at all) and I thought it was for a different kind of person. Not for me, anyway. When I was about 20 or so I remember hearing about a couple I knew who went camping for their honeymoon and thinking, “ugh, why would anybody do that?!” Now I think it’s probably a more fun and memorable honeymoon than most people have and I love hearing about people doing “alternative” honeymoons (or weddings, for that matter).

    I think part of my feelings about camping stemmed from a feeling of intimidation. I grew up on, and relied on, TV, the internet and easy access to clean water and flush toilets. I didn’t like hardship. The outdoors? Camping? You mean to tell me I need to start a fire and make food on the ground, on a tree stump, or on a picnic table? And I have to spend all day outside? After I’m done being outside for every waking moment I get to sleep inside a box made of fabric instead of in my comfortable bed in my heated/air-conditioned home? Oh, ok, you’ve gone off the rails, no thank you.

    It wasn’t until I joined CouchSurfing back in 2007 (I’m no longer a member) and I met a bunch of fun, adventurous folks that I learned I actually like camping. On my first CouchSurfing camp trip we packed 10 people in 3 canoes for a 3-day trip down the Withlacoochee River. We camped a little too close for comfort to alligators. I got bitten by a few ticks. (I don’t recommend.) There was nowhere to shower or wash (I was too afraid to swim with the gators; others weren’t!). But it was a great time and I went on another camping trip with the same group a year later.

    That was what you might call wild or backcountry camping. Find a spot somewhere on BLM or park land that’s big enough for tents and make camp. The fun part of wild camping is that you’re completely on your own. You won’t spot other people because you won’t be near a campground or civilization. No facilities except what you bring with you. You ever dig a hole and poop in the woods? It really makes you feel alive. Like you can do anything. That all is maybe also the not-so-fun part of wild camping. No judgment if you feel like that because I’m still too intimidated to wild camp on my own. Although I promise wild camping is actually a good time I prefer a little more luxury.

    Anyway, as much fun as I learned that camping could be I stopped going camping because in 2009 I got rid of almost everything and began traveling with just a small backpack.

    But then, as mentioned, my wife and I moved to the US last year.

    Within a week of arriving in the US we went on a camping trip to Sleeping Bear Dunes in northern Michigan and I remembered, “oh, right, camping is a fun travel option.” A couple months later, instead of staying at one of the expensive hotels near Niagara Falls, we camped at Niagara Falls State Park for 4 nights. (It’s nearly 20 miles north of the falls, but it’s a beautiful park. Would stay again.) On the way back from Niagara we camped at a small state park in Ohio on the banks of Lake Erie.

    Since moving to North Carolina we’d been planning on camping because there are so many nice places within a 2-4 hour drive, but I didn’t get around to buying a tent until 3 weeks ago. (Every camping trip previous to moving to NC was with borrowed gear.) Since then we’ve camped at Carolina Beach State Park and Morrow Mountain State Park.

    All that to say I’m not some kind of outdoorsman and I barely know what I’m doing. Thankfully, there is really not all that much to know.

    Also, I think it’s more useful to learn from other beginners for something like this because experts are too, here’s that word again, intimidating. Bear Grylls seems like a cool guy and all, and I’m impressed as anybody that he could drink his own piss without vomiting, but he’s so far out of my element that I wouldn’t learn anything watching him.

    Also, an expert is probably going to recommend a lot of stuff you don’t need.

    Interestingly, you probably already have most of what you need to go camping! And the stuff you don’t have will cost under $250. Maybe a lot less, depending on how you shop and what you want. Think of it like this: for the cost of one or two nights in a hotel you can buy all the gear you’ll need for camping for at least the next few years. Assuming you take care of your gear you’ve probably got a decade of use ahead of you.

    But before we get to all that, I haven’t made the case for just why I like camping so much.

    Why camping is joyful

    1. Camping makes you appreciate all the luxuries you’ve got at home. You might think you appreciate them, but you’ll appreciate them on another level once you’ve been completely cut off for X number of days.
    2. My wife and I love hiking. We go hiking most weekends. Nothing intense. Usually 5-10 miles or so. And you know what makes hiking more fun? Sleeping near hiking trails. Many (most?) state and national parks have both hiking trails and campgrounds, so it’s a perfect combination for us.
    3. It’s economical. Nightly camping fees vary widely, but it’s usually $15-$25 per night (free for wild/backcountry camping) for one camp site, which is often enough for 2 tents and 6 people. To be fair, it’s cheaper to stay at home than to camp, so it’s not like you’re saving money. I mean it’s an economical way to travel and have some fun. Anyway, with your fee you’ll usually have access to showers, flush toilets, your own fire pit, your own picnic table, and park rangers (in case you have questions or emergencies). If you’ve never camped or stayed in a hostel this will be uncomfortable for you at first, but lucky you. Being temporarily uncomfortable makes life better. You’ll appreciate the luxuries of home even more than the rest of us!
    4. Simplicity. Camping makes me remember that I don’t need much to have a good time.
    5. It feels good to rely on yourself more than usual. Even if you’re camping in a luxurious campground (read: most campgrounds) you’ve still got to set up your own home, clean up after yourself, and cook your own meals. There is no Chipotle around the corner and your weekly cleaner is not going to be there to clean up your mess. The more you love luxury the more I think you’ll actually appreciate the whole camping experience.
    6. You get to sleep outside! There is very little you can do as an adult that will make you feel like a kid again. Camping checks that box.
    7. Camp fires.
    8. It breaks your routine. What do you do most weekends? What do you do when you have Friday or Monday off, making a long weekend? Camping is something fun to do to break your routine.
    9. It’s perfect for introverts and extraverts alike. Camping is accommodating.

    There is surely more good stuff about camping that I haven’t thought of, but let’s move on to …

    The Beginner’s Guide To Tent Camping!

    As I mentioned earlier, you already probably have most of what you need to go camping, because you don’t need much to have a good time. I’ll split this up into necessities and nice-to-haves. I’ll also mention what we have, plan to have, or would like to have. (Amazon affiliate links where relevant.) And, of course, I’ll show you how easy it is to find and book campsites.

    Necessities You May Not Have Yet

    1. Tent. Obviously. While any tent will do you’ll probably like some more than others. This is why it actually helps to be able to borrow gear for your first trip. Ask around. You probably know someone that has gear and will be happy to lend it to you. You’ll quickly find out what you do and don’t like. But maybe I can help here anyway. Are you tall and/or a little lazy? Then do what I did and get an Instant Cabin tent. These things really live up to the hype. The first time we set ours up it took 15-20 minutes. Now it takes less than a minute to get the tent up and another 5 minutes or so to get the rainfly set up and to stake everything down.
      We have the Bushnell Shield Series 11′ x 9′ Instant Cabin tent and love it. It’s 6 feet tall at the center, which means I can’t stand up in it, but it’s better than a lot of other tents that are even shorter. Although this tent is rated for 6 people, I find it’s the perfect size for the two of us and our bags, with room to move around. It will only sleep 6 if you’re all using camping mats instead of inflatable mattresses. I also like that this tent has big windows on all four sides, and it has a floor level screened air vent.This tent was really difficult to get back into its carrying bag (a common complaint in reviews), but I figured it out. I bought two bungee cords from the dollar store, and wrapped them around the tent/rainfly before putting it all in the bag. This made the bag much easier to zip up and now I’m able to get a nice bundle. I put the rainfly pole in its bag strapped onto the top of the tent bag instead of putting it inside. See photo:

      Proof that it fits back in its bag!

      Price: ~$140 at Walmart.com (but use TopCashback or eBates to save at least $10; that’s what I did)

      Note: if you want to save even more money buy a regular (meaning, not instant) tent. They cost a good $50 less and they really only take an extra 10-20 minutes to set up.

    2. Tarp. A tarp is a cheap way to protect the bottom of your tent. It also helps keep your tent clean, making it easier to pack up. Maybe not a necessity, but it’s so cheap I’m saying it is.
      How to use: Lay your tarp down. Build your tent on top of it. You should get a tarp the size of the base of your tent or a little smaller. Bigger than the base of your tent is not better, because if it rains you’ll be sleeping in a puddle. The tarp I already had was 9′ x 7′ but I’ll pick up a slightly bigger one the next time I’m at Harbor Freight.You can find small tarps at the dollar store, and they’re sometimes even free at Harbor Freight (sign up for their coupons).
      Price: under $10
    3. Air mattress or camping pad. We have this cheap Intex queen size air mattress from Amazon. Including the hand pump it was under $20 (it’s $24 at time of writing this). That said, I dislike air mattresses and we will probably transition to camping pads instead. If you like to sleep on something soft then you’ll probably like an air mattress more than a camping pad.
      Price: under $25
    4. First Aid Kit. Truth be told you probably won’t need more than a bottle of hydrogen peroxide,
      rubbing alcohol, and bandaids if you’ll be at an established campground. But first aid kits are so cheap you might as well get one. We have a $10 kit from Walmart. I also bring hydrogen peroxide, ibuprofen, and generic benadryl (because I have bad tree/weed pollen allergies).
      Price: under $10
    5. Stove. Unless you’re going to cook over the fire pit, of course. We have the $15 Ozark Trail Single Burner Propane stove from Walmart (again, use TopCashback or eBates to save at least $10 on your first purchase) and love it. Propane bottles are cheap ($5 or less), are widely available at Walmart and other stores and campground offices, and they last for quite some time.
      Price: $15

    That’s about it for things you probably need to buy! All told, less than $200.

    Necessities You May Already Have

    You might not have all of this stuff, but I wouldn’t be surprised if you have most of it.

    • Bedsheets/blankets or sleeping bags. We currently use bedsheets/blankets that we already had, but we’ll buy sleeping bags when it starts getting colder. Price: probably free.
    • Toiletries. You probably won’t need toilet paper since most campgrounds have daily cleaning/replenishment, but maybe take one roll just in case. I also bring a roll of paper towels, a box of tissues, a package of wet wipes, and hand sanitizer. Other than that bring whatever you’d bring on any vacation.
    • Flip flops. For showering/beach. $1 at Walmart. For the past year I’ve been using the “disposable” flip flops they give you at Niagara Falls, but they’re finally falling apart. Also, I stepped on a rusty screw last weekend and it pierced my heel so maybe I should have something with a stronger sole?
    • Towels. For showering/beach. I like my quick dry camping towel that I’ve had since 2011. My wife takes a regular bath towel. And we also take beach towels.
    • Foldable camping or beach chairs. Not necessarily a necessity, but I’m listing it here because they’re more comfortable than picnic tables to sit on and not all campgrounds will include a picnic table with your campsite. You can pick these up for $20-$30 each.
    • Trash bags (or small plastic shopping bags). So you don’t have to make 35 trips to the camp’s garbage bins.
    • Rope. So you can hang up your towels to dry between two trees. Buy it at the dollar store, Harbor Freight, or Walmart. Or you might already have some.
    • Knife, box cutter, or utility knife. For cutting rope and other stuff. I usually forget my knife — a butterfly knife I bought when I was 17, which I guess is illegal to carry? Well, at least guns are illegal as well! /s — but I have my dollar store utility knife, which gets the job done.
    • Flashlights. You can get free flashlights with purchase from the aforementioned Harbor Freight. I have one of their 27 LED Portable Worklights, which has a pop out hook so it’s perfect to hang from the loop on the ceiling of your tent. It’s $3.99 when it’s not free. I also have a Fenix e05 that I bought in 2011. It’s still going strong! Lastly, we just purchased this under $15 combo tent light/fan because after our Carolina Beach trip where it was nearly 90F at night and sleeping was rough we thought we should have some luxury. The light is great, but we didn’t use the fan on our last trip so we’ll see if that was worth it.Buy either rechargeable batteries or go to the dollar store. Batteries are ridiculously cheap there. (I have both rechargeable and wasteful batteries.) Price: you probably already have, but $15 or less.
    • Pots/pans. We used to take just one pot, but now we take two. We use one for cooking and one for boiling water for coffee/tea/oatmeal. If we had a tea kettle we’d use that instead, but a pot works just fine. Price: you’ve already got them.
    • Cups/bowls/utensils. We bring both wasteful (read: disposable) and regular. Do whatever feels right for you.Note: the Contigo AutoSeal is the best insulated coffee bottle I’ve ever used. My wife uses it daily and we bring it camping and on our weekend hikes.
    • Lighter or matches. You’ve gotta start that fire somehow! BTW, I’m a longtime camp fire failure, but let me save you from being one: when you get to your campsite walk around and gather lots of dry leaves or twigs. Throw them in the middle of your fire pit. When you’re ready for a camp fire light them up and wait until they’re burning nicely. Keep adding more twigs and small branches. Once those are going strong finally add your real firewood (which you purchase for $4 or $5 from the camp host or park office or gather from vacant campsites or the surrounding woods). I always transitioned far too quickly from twigs to big firewood and it would take forever to get the fire going. A little patience goes a long way.
    • Water. We bring our refillable water bottles as well as store-bought water bottles. Soon I’ll buy a 5 gallon jug because that will make trips to the water spigot easier.
    • Food. We keep it simple. Canned beans. Canned soups. Side dish rice/pasta (like the Knorr brand; $1 each or so). Oatmeal. Clif bars and other junk foods. Coffee/tea. We love good coffee so we take our AeroPress. No reason you can’t have an amazing cup of coffee in the morning!

    Nice To Have, But Not Necessary

    • Headlamp. We don’t have them, but have used them and they’re much more convenient than flashlights. We’ll buy some eventually when they’re on sale somewhere.
    • Broom or hand vac. Your tent’s gonna get some dirt inside no matter what you do. I have a Ryobi One+ hand vac. I bought it for the car (since I already had three One+ batteries for my power tools) and it’s great for camping as well. If I didn’t have this I’d buy a broom and dust pan from the dollar store.
    • Fire starter. These are little bricks of fuel that are easy to light and stay lit for about 5 minutes. They’re sold in the outdoor section of Walmart and probably at your camp office. It makes starting your camp fire much easier, but it also feels like less of an accomplishment. That said, I have some and used them until I finally figured out how to be patient with my fire. They’re also good for starting fires in wet environs.
    • Cooler. We’ll probably get one eventually so we can bring along veggie dogs and other foods that should stay cool.
    • Hatchet or hand saw or hammer or combination of two or just a hatchet. A hatchet or hammer will make staking down your tent easier, but you can just as easily use your foot, a piece of wood, or a rock. A hatchet or hand saw is nice to have if you want to chop your own wood. Don’t cut down live trees or branches! It’s illegal and there are lots of fallen trees/branches all over the place. You can also raid your neighbors after they checkout of the campground. I always buy one bundle of wood from the camp host the first night and then try to scavenge for subsequent nights. I didn’t bring a saw until our most recent trip and it came in really handy. Our neighbors scavenged a small dead tree and then checked out. It took me about an hour to saw it into manageable pieces and carry it to our fire pit, but it was worth it. I used an old cheap small hand saw (like what they sell at the dollar store) which wasn’t easy, but I got paid (by not spending money on fire wood) to work out. (Next time I’ll take my better hand saw, or maybe even my battery powered jigsaw.)

      Free firewood. All I had to do was saw a fallen tree into pieces.

    The reality is there are a lot of nice-to-haves so I’ll stop there. You can make camping as rustic or luxurious as you like. I like it somewhere in the middle.

    “Wait, that’s all well and good, Karol, but where do I find/book campgrounds?”

    If you’re looking for something close then Google “state park near me” and “national park near me” to find the closest of those near you. Or just scroll around on Google Maps until you find big spots of green. That’s probably a state or national park.

    To book campsites:

    You don’t need to book campsites ahead of time, but if you’re planning on camping during a national holiday it’ll be your best bet. Campgrounds fill up fast during holidays.

    I’d also suggest heading to your local library and picking up a book on tent camping and/or hiking trails in your state. Here in North Carolina I’ve made use of The Best In Tent Camping: The Carolinas by Johnny Molloy and North Carolina Hiking Trails by Allen de Hart.

    “OK, got it. Now what the &$#! am I supposed to do while I’m camping, huh?”

    Haha.

    You can do anything you want! Go hiking! Go swimming! Read a book! Nap! Whittle! Relax! Breathe!

    To be honest, I know camping seems boring to a lot of people and it seems like there isn’t much to do, but the time flies. There is always a trail to explore and a fire to build and enjoy. It’s easy to spend a whole day doing nothing more than that and still feel incredibly fulfilled.

    I’m not saying you need to go camping, but even if you think you won’t like it I think you’ll appreciate it so maybe you should try it. Particularly if you haven’t been camping since you were young and/or prefer expensive dinners and fancy hotels on your travels. If you’ve pampered yourself into wimpiness and stubbornness you need it more than you probably know.

     

  • Introducing Spiteful Altruism (and How We Are Giving Away $3,000+)

    The thing about tolerance is that even if you are a compassionate, empathetic individual, tolerance is not a blanket requirement. You do not, under any circumstances, have to tolerate those who are intolerant. Some people recommend ignoring them. Some people recommend forgiving them. Some people recommend turning the other cheek and giving them carte blanche to do what they will. Some people recommend making it known they are unacceptable. Any of those ideas can be effective dependent upon the situation. But I also like to do things my own way.

    I wrote three versions of this essay. The first, the cynical and angry version began like this …

    I don’t feel good about any of this. But I think the best thing about the recent past and the coming future is that I can tell it like it is and nobody is allowed to get upset or — gasp! — offended by it because it’s what they asked for. Your — our — feelings don’t matter. The new normal. Hoorah.

    So it begins. January 20, 2017. Inauguration day. The first Dunning-Kruger Presidency. And for the second time in 16 years the losers win. But this time it was in the worst way. Outright lies. Propaganda. “Post-truths.” Dirty disinformation tactics. Or as the right is now required to call it: дезинформация.

    Entitled precious snowflake demands-a-participation-trophy-for-every-thought-or-action Tweety McThinskin Donald Trump officially becomes my — our — President in a multi-million vote losing win. A whole lot of folks who think celebrities shouldn’t have a say in politics voted for a two-bit celebrity.

    Because it’s not that they want celebrities to shut up. It’s that they want celebrities who have ideas counter to theirs to shut up. And that constitutes the majority of artists (actors, musicians, et al.). You won’t hear conservatives telling Chachi to be quiet. But I guess you could argue that he’s hardly a celebrity? Anyway …

    I used to be one of those naïve folks who thought we could work together across party lines. We can be reasonable, right? Compromise is good, no? See the other side, shake hands, so on and so forth? But that thought changed early last year with the Supreme Court fiasco. (To be fair, I should have seen it sooner and that’s my fault.)

    No, we can’t work together because most of them are not interested and they’re using your non-confrontational let’s-work-it-out ideals against you. You’re sitting ducks. It’s almost too easy. You were tricked. You were fooled. And you didn’t care or realize it until it was too late. (If you realized it at all.) My hope is that this makes you furious and spurs you to action.

    And version one of this essay went on from there for another thousand words. But that’s enough. The second essay was less angry, but still heavy on cynicism. This third version is probably still fairly angry and cynical, but it’s more pragmatic. At least I did the best I could at this particular moment in time.

    I do think those on the left, right, and center can work together, but the far left and the far right are so extremist I don’t see that happening. Interestingly, if you subscribe to Horseshoe Theory then the far left and far right are closer to each other than to the center. For example, both are anti-intellectual when it comes to basic science.

    Although, interestingly, they’re wrong about different aspects of the sciences … except vaccines and GMOs. Common ground there. Ugh. Can we begin having a high school level science test as a requirement for holding public office, please? I’d probably even settle for middle school level. (Compromise!)

    Another problem is that too many folks who are on the far right (or left) are so self unaware and delusional they think they’re being reasonable. I can’t even begin to propose a solution to that. Watch less TV? Read more? When a black family moves in across the street in your white neighborhood instead of shouting “where are these black people coming from?!” maybe invite them over for coffee and cake? Baby steps. I don’t know.

    Is the moderate left, moderate right, and center big enough to make up for the fanatics on the far right and far left. I’m not optimistic, but it’s the only thread I’m hanging on.

    But even if this group is big enough is it even possible to bring those of us who are not on the extremes together? Again, I don’t know. I’ll do what I can by supporting conservatives who are trying to be a bridge across the center. There aren’t many of them. One of the most vocal right now seems to be Evan McMullin. I don’t agree with him on most things, but at least he comes across as an ethical man of integrity. It’s possible to work together with people you disagree with if they’re people of integrity.

    With that long preamble let’s get to the good, or depending on the type of person you are, the bad. Actually, this is a good test. You’ll likely only believe this is bad if you’re an authoritarian zealot who thinks racism doesn’t exist and/or women’s place is in the kitchen and/or poor people deserve it. You likely also believe liberals are communists because you’re intellectually stunted and don’t understand what words mean. Oops, anger is showing. No feelings …

    Today begins the year(s) of Spiteful Altruism. That is, giving out of spite. (Is that cynical?)

    I’ve generally been a giver as an adult and have given away in the vicinity of $100k — to charities and to individuals — over the past 15 years. From a wealth building perspective that was dumb and about two years ago I decided most big giving would stop — no more $5k or $10k checks, but maybe $100 here and there — until our net worth is more significant. But what’s the point of wealth if you live in a bubble and outside that bubble are people much like you who are hurting or struggling, most through no faults of their own?

    No, life’s not fair and never will be, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to help people if we’re able to. My wife and I are able to. (Although I would like to point out that while this is with her full support she doesn’t necessarily endorse my methods and she is much more kind than I am here.) Many of the folks who are supposed to be role models — elected officials, baby boomer parents — are anything but so we have to put it upon ourselves.

    I’ve had a lot of ups and downs (oh hello foreclosure), but I’ve generally had more than enough. I mean, I’ve never had to wonder if I could afford 2,000+ calories per day or anything close to that. So I’ve always been happy to give. But this time?

    This time it’s different. Usually giving came from a positive place and I didn’t talk about most of it in public or in private. Now I think maybe if I talk about it then fellow misanthropes will join me, get louder, and stand up for or support more causes they care about. If nothing else, maybe it will make me feel better. (Oops, I forgot the no feelings rule again. This isn’t easy.)

    If we don’t do something now then we’ll have nothing worth having in the future anyway so I’m trying to remember the long game.

    That’s not to say I think money alone is the answer here. Maybe you’re not into giving money or you actually have to worry about affording those 2,000+ calories per day. If, instead, you’re the type of person to engage in non-violent protest (the thin-skinned right hates protest if that’s at all motivating for you) or volunteer time or even take 15 minutes to call the folks in office who are supposed to represent you then high five to you. Thank you for being and doing good. There isn’t a single correct approach, but it helps if everybody does something. Another motivating factor: if you feel defeated and feel like you can’t do anything about anything that’s exactly what they want you to think and feel. Don’t let them beat you so easily.

    Anyway, here is where the first $3,000+ is going.

    • Planned Parenthood. Because fuck supporters of anti-woman (and anti-gay and anti-personal-freedom and anti-many-other-things) VP Mike Pence and the rest of the “keep government out of people’s lives except when it has anything to do with Christianity and women’s bodies” Republicans. It’s fine if you’re anti-abortion, but maybe you should also support those children and the families that didn’t want them after they’re forced to be born? (Also, please take a 9th grade biology class and learn about the reproductive process.) And maybe shut the fuck up and don’t force your flawed man-made ideology on the rest of us. In the words of Republican hero and Founding Father John Adams, taken from Article 11 of the Treaty of Tripoli (1797): “the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion.” In case it wasn’t clear, this is a fuck you to you holier-than-thou immoral dregs who think you’re morally superior. You are the problem. Planned Parenthood gets $2,400 ($200/month for at least the next 12 months). http://plannedparenthood.org

    • Freedom From Religion Foundation (FFRF). They protect the US Constitution, plain and simple. The same Constitution that Republicans pretend to love (only as long as we’re talking about the Second Amendment). FFRF fights to keep the separation of church and state real in this country and it’s going to be a greater struggle now with President Trump and Vice President Pence and their Christian extremist cabinet. FFRF gets $100. http://ffrf.org

    • American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU). The first sign that they do good is that they’re strongly disliked by our new administration and those on the far right. The ACLU protects our constitutional rights and here is their plan to fight the Trump administration. They get $120 ($10/month for at least 12 months). https://www.aclu.org
    • Against Malaria Foundation. They’re one of the most effective charities at what they do according to GiveWell. Against Malaria buys and distributes mosquito nets to people to help prevent malaria. In other words, they save lives. They get $250, which buys 100 mosquito nets. This link is to our fundraising page if you’d like to join us (and you can see our $250 donation there): https://www.againstmalaria.com/gajda
    • Ex-Muslims of North America because people need to stop treating religion with kid’s gloves, read at least some of the Quran, and support the individuals who are persecuted or worse for leaving Islam. No religion — definitely not Islam, definitely not Christianity — is a religion of peace (well, maybe Jainism?) and the sooner you stop convincing yourself otherwise the sooner we can all progress passed using man-made fairy tales as a basis for living. They get $100. http://exmna.org
    • RIP Medical Debt because they’re a sweet organization that abolishes medical debt for Americans who should never have to incur medical debt in the first place. Unfortunately, we have a large contingency of people who would rather watch folks suffer or die than help them. It’s also personal. As an American with pre-existing conditions I may need this organization at some point in the future after the people now in power get their way. That’s assuming we can’t fix their deadly mistakes by then. Over the long term — a generation, two generations? — I’m optimistic that we will, though. They get $100. https://www.ripmedicaldebt.org

    More to come when we can. If you have an organization you think is worthy please share it in the comments or in a private message.

    Sheesh. Telling it like it is sure is tiring and that didn’t end on the positive note I was hoping for. Maybe I should start tweeting again and keep it to 140 characters.

    Welcome to the present.

    “Democracy is messy. … But I believe in this country. I believe in the American people.” – 44th President of the United States Barack Obama at his final press conference as President (January 18, 2017)

    I believe in us as well, President Obama. Thank you.

    Peace, love, and don’t let them drag you down.

    -Karol-

    P.S. If this essay resonated with you it will probably resonate with your friends. Please share it on Facebook:

  • Introducing TheHappyLetter.com

    I just launched TheHappyLetter.com. One short story or anecdote daily, smile included.

    I hope you like it.

  • Okay, Okayer, Okayest – My Favorites of 2016

    I may be late to the party, but it’s nice to reflect on some good things once in a while. (Here’s my list from last year.) Probably more than once in a while, but besides 2016 not being a good year politically it was also a worse year personally. So let’s start: Gravitational waves! Solar power!

    Whew, I feel better already.

    It wasn’t all bad personally because …

    My wife and I finally moved to the US! We’re currently living in the Raleigh, NC suburbs within walking distance of my wife’s work. If you know me at all you know I loathe the suburbs, but public transportation is relegated to few cities so the next best option is to live as close to work as possible and drive everywhere else. (Another option is to not take a job in the suburbs, but it’s not relevant to our case since my wife wanted this job, turned down others, and I support her decision.) The trick to living in the suburbs is to actually force yourself to gtfo, which isn’t always easy. We’ve been doing an okay job (there’s a wonderful state park just a few miles away!), but we should probably sit down to budget time and money specifically for getting out more often.

    Books

    I didn’t read very much last year. I completed 30 books, the lowest total in years. I gave two books 5 stars on GoodReads.

    Heretic: Why Islam Needs A Reformation Now by Ayaan Hirsi Ali

    First off, Ms. Ali is a hero. Second off, this is a must-read for liberals (and moderates too), particularly those who consider themselves progressives.

    Digging Up Mother: A Love Story by Doug Stanhope

    This was so good and sweet and sad and hilarious and I hate that when something is all of those things I don’t know how to express it. Doug Stanhope is one of my favorite stand up comics, but his comedy is not for everybody. Which, I know, is true of probably literally everything in the world so I just used a bunch of words to say nothing and wasted time, yours and mine. Anyway, this book is the story of Doug helping his mother commit suicide. But it’s actually a lot more than that. Read it if you want to cry and laugh, or cry laughing.

    Bonus, although I didn’t give this one 5 stars, I gave it 4 and it was great:

    Elon Musk: Inventing The Future by Ashley Vance

    This is engagingly written and Elon Musk is a world treasure. If only we could create more people like him.

    Music

    Since I don’t use Spotify anymore I wasn’t able to keep track of my most played music of the year. It’s the one downside to Amazon Music, but I can deal with it since the only benefit of keeping track of what I listen to is writing about it here. Also, a note: I cancelled Spotify last January and started only using Amazon Prime Music. But we got an Amazon Echo a few months ago and now have the $3.99/month Amazon Music Unlimited plan for it. It’s working out swimmingly. (More on Echo soon.)

    Every Open Eye by Chvrches

    Really, it should be both Chvrches albums since they’re both on repeat constantly in the house. Every Open Eye was released in 2015, but I didn’t listen to this band until January 2016 — thanks to my obsession with Metric — so it counts for me here.

    Must listen track: Bury It

    22, A Million by Bon Iver

    For Emma, Forever Ago is still tops for me, but Justin Vernon can do no wrong. This album is spectacular.

    I can’t currently name any other new albums I listened to and loved in 2016. There has to be something that I’m missing, but as it is I listened to a lot of these artists: Coheed & Cambria, Metric, Leonard Cohen, Nirvana, Alice In Chains, The White Buffalo, Creedence Clearwater Revival, silverchair … well, ok, I think I’ll stop naming everything I listen to because we’ll be here all day.

    One interesting aside: after a 5 year obsession with country music it mostly waned last year. I still listen to Tammy Wynette, Carrie Underwood, and Miranda Lambert fairly regularly, though. Those three have some of the best voices in music.

    Comedy

    I’ve been a stand up comedy fan since 6th grade when I bought George Carlin’s Classic Gold from the Columbia House music club. If there is one profession I wish I was brave enough to try it would be stand up comedy. My wife laughs at me because when I listen to comedy I usually have a total serious expression on my face, but inside I am often bursting at the seams. I don’t know what that’s about, but maybe it’s because great comedy will make you think.

    Thoughts & Prayers by Anthony Jeselnik

    Anthony Jeselnik is the funniest comedian of the past decade. His older albums are perfect. His latest, Thoughts & Prayers, is as well. I’ve easily listened to it a dozen times by now.

    No Place Like Home by Doug Stanhope

    You probably won’t like Stanhope’s comedy, but if you’re a misanthropic fuck up then it might just be up your alley.

    If you like Louis C.K. because you think, “wtf! did he just say that?!” then you need to listen to both of these guys.

    Film

    I saw very few new movies last year, but one can only watch Ghost World so many times before needing a change.

    Zootopia

    I know there have been a lot of good animated films made in my time, but I would put this one right at the top. It’s sweet and hilarious.

    Tech

    Amazon Echo

    Do you remember when you were 13 and you had a 6 CD changer stereo and you just couldn’t believe you could listen to so much great music so easily? Now add just about every album ever released, top it off with instant timers and weather and personal assistant type features, and you have Amazon Echo.

    I considered getting the Google Home device, but Echo is better for our needs. It’s cheaper ($3.99 for Amazon Music Unlimited vs $9.99/month for Google Music), the wake word is human (“Alexa” as opposed to “OK Google”) which feels nice, and it has more integration possibilities at the moment. (Although we don’t use any of them yet.)

    Audiophiles may complain that the speakers don’t compare to a high end stereo. They would be correct. The lack of EQ or even fine tuned volume control (for example, the difference between a volume setting of 2 and 3 is too vast and there is no in between) is disappointing. But it suits our needs and I would buy Echo again.

    My other favorites — Apps, YouTubers, and Podcasts el al. — aren’t all that different from last year so I won’t repeat them.

    That’s all for this year. Thanks for reading.

  • No, it doesn’t look great, but …

    Wed. Nov 9, 2016. 4:18pm

    I know, I know. “Bigotry wins. Misogyny wins. Science denying wins. Egalitarianism loses. Being brash, rude, mean and divisive is the new normal. The Electoral College is broken.” Etc, etc. I’m not sure I completely believe all of that — maybe Trump is a genius, he’s really a centrist, and he scammed the GOP? — but no need for me to continue down that road anyway.

    The reality is Hillary Clinton lost fair and square. She got more votes, but lost the more important Electoral College. The last time this happened back in 2000 I actually voted for the eventual winner and thought it was wrong. This time I don’t feel it’s any less wrong. But it is the system we have. Losing hurts, but losing is part of life.

    I won’t place blame. Approximately 4% of voters chose a third party and that is well within their rights. I did what I could to steer them towards Hillary Clinton, but it wasn’t enough. I don’t blame them. Third party voters did not lose this election. Democrats lost this election by not showing up at the polls.

    (That said, I’m not quite that kind. I do blame some of those third party voters for believing so many of the lies and conspiracies about Hillary Clinton. How do we teach critical thinking to those who refuse to accept it? I don’t know.)

    I won’t blame the youth, either. Did they turn out? No, not as much as they could have. But this is their world and if they’re indifferent then there’s not much anybody can do about it. Maybe this will inspire them.

    I’ve mentioned before that not much will change for me personally no matter who is president. (We’ll talk health insurance another day. ObamaCare was the best thing I’d ever had in over a dozen years of buying my own individual insurance.)

    I don’t vote for me, though. My wife and I don’t plan to have children so I don’t vote for them, either. I vote for my nieces. I vote for my friends’ children. I vote for my friends who are in the minority (although a minority of minorities voted Trump, so maybe they know something we don’t?). I vote for the people who are directly affected, and disaffected as the case may be, due to extremist policy change. I’m nervous that the US is becoming like the country of my birth, but that looks like the way it’s going. I think we’ll be able to fix this before the youngsters I know are old enough to vote. I hope so. But it may be difficult. There is a lot of anger out there across the political spectrum and we need to figure out how to do something about that. I don’t know what.

    What I do know is that in 2018 we will have midterm elections. All 435 seats in the House of Representatives are up for grabs and 33 of the 100 Senate seats will be contested. The best we can hope for is that the next two years will inspire (or horrify) those who didn’t vote to get out and do so. And yes, I know gerrymandering has made it difficult to pick up a majority of seats in the House, but crazier things have happened. *ahem* The Senate, though? That’s where we can make things happen. It will be quite difficult since there are 25 Dem seats, including 5 in red states, up for grabs. But crazier things have happened. *ahem* A lot of you are looking to 2020. That’s great. But we’ve got to do something to inspire the youth to vote in 2018. We can stop the hemorrhaging sooner rather than later. Maybe a Donald Trump presidency is just what we need to inspire more people who are directly affected by the political process to actually participate. (Or, hear me out here, maybe a Donald Trump presidency won’t be as bad as we thought. I’m not expecting that to be the case, but it’s possible.)

    As a moderate independent who has voted Republican and Democrat in the past I have already made a vow to never vote Republican again. It’s not that I think Republicans are terrible, but the lack of transparency, the lack of policy ideas, and the number of outright lies in their campaign this year made me lose all respect. They don’t deserve my vote. This was the first time I actually didn’t vote for a single Republican on the ballot. I hope other moderates will join me, because although the far left is misguided it isn’t terrifying like the far right. The far left is misguided about things like GMOs and nuclear energy and being honest about religion. The far right is misguided about that in addition to, incredibly enough, high school level science (e.g. evolution, climate change, biology). They are also misguided about the state of the world and humanity itself. Things were already good, even great. And humans are mostly good and incredibly resilient.

    I don’t want to live in a hateful world anymore than you do. The next few years may not look great, but we don’t know yet how things will shape up. Maybe there are some Republicans left in Congress who have morals. I’m not counting on it, but maybe. If so, maybe Donald Trump will not have a near authoritarian power to do what he wants. That’s how our government is supposed to work, but with Republican majorities in all the relevant places it’s hard to understand how there will be checks and balances. (OK, the Senate does not have a fillibuster proof majority, but that’s not much of a positive.) At this point all we can do is hope and I know that kind of uncertainty doesn’t inspire pleasant feelings.

    I don’t know how to close this except to say that it will be okay. You’ll get through this. We’ll get through this. Whatever you are feeling please feel it. And then get to work to fix this. Don’t give up. Don’t give in.

    ###

    If you’d like a soundtrack here are two tracks for you:

    “But I still believe
    And I will rise up with fists
    And I will take what’s mine mine mine”

    Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins – Rise Up (With Fists!!)

    “I want to find the water
    That will wash this whole damn slate clean
    Break down, break up
    We sleep in what we create

    Right now, I’m living so much hate”

    boysetsfire – Still Waiting For The Punchline

    ###

    Thursday morning (Nov 10). I didn’t even send this post out to my e-mail list and I’m already sending “Deplorable Jack” comments to spam. Wow, that was quick. As has always been my comment policy: I am writing in public. You must also. Anonymity has no place in open dialogue.

  • A bigly tremendous rhyme

    Update Nov 9, 2016: WOW. Sorry, America, we didn’t do our jobs well enough. But the youth will prevail. Eventually.

    Believe me, people are saying this is the best poem ever and it’s already winning all the greatest awards. There is nobody who respects poetry more than I do and what you’re about to read proves that tremendously.

    This goes a lot better spoken than written because you’ve got to get the rhythm right, but I’ve been procrastinating on recording it so here we go. Note: I wrote this in just a few minutes after the 3rd debate (inspired by the work of Poem For Your Sprog), then added/edited for a few minutes before deciding to post it.

    He goes by Trump, a tremendous grump
    Bigly afraid to lose
    So when you vote please not by rote
    It’s important who you choose
    Bigotry, misogyny
    “Locker room talk!” some seem to think
    But when he says, “grab their pussy”
    It sends us to the brink
    “Don’t be so sensitive! It’s just a joke!”
    But no, that won’t explain it
    The truth is he’s just no good
    People are saying, “a piece of shit”
    Political correctness is not the problem
    Another tired old argument
    You don’t decide what hurts whom
    You intellectual adolescent
    Peaceful transition is beyond his comprehension
    The temperament of a child
    “Of course I’ll accept the results … if I win!”
    And his crowd, of course, went wild
    But don’t you see, our democracy
    is not yours to define
    What you believe is an autocracy
    with a side of whine
    It’s almost time, we’ve come to this
    The end is ever closer
    As if it could be any other way I say
    “Of course I’m with her!”

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BL9M61wBagR/